Their Stories

Post by Angela Raines

aka Doris McCraw

Photo (C) Doris McCraw

For those who know me, you know how important learning the stories of people who lived so many years ago, is to me. Old newspapers, cemetery headstones, early biographies, and old books are where I spend a lot of time.

In these quiet research times, I can immerse myself in the stories of not only the famous but also the everyday people who went about living their lives, and ultimately in their own way impacted the time we now live in. It is these people who helped the famous achieve their success.

Photo (C) Doris McCraw

In my spare reading time, I enjoy hunting down early biographies such as "Following the Guidon" by Elizabeth Bacon Custer, which I am working through. Any book by Helen (Hunt) Jackson, for the history of Illinois, where I grew up, "The History of Warsaw, Illinois" a town on the Mississippi River.

Each story I read, and each headstone I research allows me to use my imagination to step back in time, to visualize how people lived and thought. The historic newspapers give me a sense of what people thought was important, their sense of humor, and how they celebrated life.

This is what I choose to continue to experience in 2024. What do you plan to experience in the coming year?

Until next time:

Stay Safe & Stay Well

Doris

TALKING WITH THE DEAD - CEMETERIES

 Post by Doris McCraw writing as Angela Raines

Photo property of the author

I recently came across the phrase 'talking with the dead'. Initially, I thought it sounded rather morbid until I thought about what it was really about. To me, it's connecting with the past in ways we might not think about. This also follows an earlier post about what inspires your stories. For those who would like to take a look at that post, here is the link: What Inspires Your Stories 

The second post on inspiring stories: Talking with the Dead- Photographs

This post will focus on Cemeteries.  I know you may be thinking I'm talking about seances and such, but it's more about reading the headstones, taking in the style, and sometimes researching to find out more. 

One headstone I saw drew me in. It is almost faded and I felt I needed to find out more before the name completely disappears. The name is Jahn Jankovitz. The dates listed are 1848-1915. You can see the stone had been broken at one time. So who was Jahn (John) Jankovitz? According to Ancestry, he was born in Austria. He owned property east of Colorado Springs near the town of Calhan. He was Catholic and died of blood poisoning. He had a wife, but she doesn't have a headstone in the cemetery that I can tell. That may be a story worth following up to find out what happened to her. 

Photo property of the author

Gerald de Coursey was born in 1833 in Pennsylvania. His father, Samuel, was a sea captain. He worked at an importing house in PA before moving to Colorado Springs in 1872 to work as the secretary/treasurer of the Colorado Springs Company and secretary of the National Land Improvement Company. He died at the age of forty-one. His obituary in the local paper sang his praises as a man who was good at details, modest, and generally liked my most. His life, when you start to put the puzzle pieces together, is fascinating. 

Another person who I've written about before, Helen (Hunt) Jackson, had this to say about de Coursey and his final resting place

"Below on the soft, pink planes is a grave. It lies in the shade of great pines on a low hill to the west of town. Surely, never did a little colony find ready to its hand, a lovelier burial place than this. Long ago there must have been watercourses among these low hills, else these pines could never have grown as high and strong. The watercourses are dried now and only Barron Sands lie around the roots of the great trees, but still they live and flourish as green in December as in June, and the wind in their branches chance endless chance above the graves. This grave that we love lies with four pines guarding it closely, on a westward slope which holds the very last rays of the setting sun. We look up into the glorious snow-topped peaks which pierce the sky, and the way seems very short over which our friend has gone."

Photo property of the author

Maybe the next time you look for inspiration or just information, you might spend some time among the stones of a cemetery. From there you can use Ancestry, Digital Newspapers to find even more about who is resting there. So much history and so many stories waiting to be told if we spend some time 'talking with the dead'. 

One of the stories I'm working on is about a runaway boy who is taken in by a spinster. Here is a short excerpt from the rough draft:

The snow kept falling and Harold was worried. Miss Geraldine was feeling poorly, and the wind had drifted the snow up past the windows. Now, while the wind had died down, the temperature was steadily dropping.

Moving away from the window, Harold walked back to the kitchen where he’d moved the daybed. It was the warmest room in the house, but the woodpile was getting low. He’d need to venture outside for more fairly soon.

Harold tried to be quiet, but Geraldine, her cheeks flushed, spoke, “Harold, it will be okay. We all have our time on the earth, but it isn’t forever.”

Kneeling, Harold took her hand in his large one, “Don’t talk like that. You will be fine before you know it.”

Geraldine patted his larger one with her free hand. “We never know when our time will come, we only can do the best we can while here.”

Harold started to say something but her eyes closed, her hand dropping away.

“Damn snow!”

Doris Gardner-McCraw -

Author, Speaker, Historian-specializing in
Colorado and Women's History

Western Writers of America,

Colorado Author League,

Women Writing the West

Angela Raines - author: Telling Stories Where Love & History Meet

Books: Angela Raines Books

Website: Angela Raines - author

Angela Raines FaceBook: Click Here

Halloween & Cemeteries - What people say

 Post by Doris McCraw writing as Angela Raines 

 

Photo property of the author

With Halloween just a few days away it seemed appropriate to look at what people say about the day and about cemeteries. 

Halloween:

“A person should always choose a costume which is in direct contrast to her own personality.” From "It's a Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

"When witches go riding, and black cats are seen, the moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween." Anonymous 

And I do like this one:

When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam, may luck be your on Halloween." Anonymous

And of course, while not Halloween, one cannot forget the witches from the 'Scottish' play by Shakespeare.

"Double, double, toil and trouble, Fire burn and cauldron bubble."

Photo property of the author

Even the wonderful Ray Bradbury had something to say about the day:

"Anyone could see that the wind was a special wind this night, and the darkness took on a special feel because it was All Hallow's Eve"

Dia de Los Muertos or the Mexican Day of the Dead is a celebration the occurs near the Halloween holiday. In simple terms, it is a celebration of those who have passed. One day a year, our departed come back to celebrate with us. For more on this celebration: Day of the Dead

And that leads us to cemeteries:

“Blasted grave marker. There sure are a bloody lot of them. They've got some nerve burying all these dead people here.”  from Camille

"There's no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery. You can't do any business from there."

Colonel Sanders

"Every man should keep a fair-sized cemetery in which to bury the faults of his friends."

Henry Ward Beecher

Photo property of the author

"The Cemetery of Forgotten Books is a metaphor, not just for books but for ideas, for language, for knowledge, for beauty, for all the things that make us human, for collecting memory."

Carlos Ruiz Zafon

And one of my favorites is from the book 'Dead Beat' part of the Dresden Files by Jim Butcher:

"The cemetery isn't open after dark. Most aren't, and there's a reason for it. Everybody knows the reason, and nobody talks about it. It isn't because there are dead people in there. It's because there are not-quite-dead people in there. Ghosts and shadows linger in graveyards more than anywhere else, especially in the older cities of the country, where the oldest, biggest cemeteries are right there in the middle of town. That's why people build walls around graveyards, even if they're only two feet high—not to keep people out, but to keep other things in. Walls can have a kind of power in the spirit world, and the walls around graveyards are almost always filled with the unspoken intent of keeping the living and the unliving seated at different sections of the community dinner table."

Photo property of the author

I hope you found a look at how people view Halloween and Cemeteries interesting. Below is an excerpt from my short story 'Gilbert Hopkins is Going to Die' in the anthology "Under Western Stars".

          “You’re going to die, Gilbert Hopkins, everyone does. But not today.” Gilbert said every morning upon arising, and every evening after his meal. “You have yet to make your mark on the world.” He also would remind himself at odd times during the day.

            The day was like so many others in his life. At the start of the day, Gilbert would put on the coffee, take care of his ablutions, then sit and prepare the list of his daily tasks. Day after day he followed this routine. At night he would review his list and add anything he felt should be included. In his mind, this was the perfect way to achieve his goal of making his mark in the world. Gilbert knew he was going to die, everyone did. However, he wanted to be remembered.

          From an early age, Gilbert always believed he would make a huge difference in the world. He’d pondered how he’d accomplish this goal and decided being a newspaperman was the way to achieve it. He’d studied important reporters and newspaper owners trying to learn their secrets. He made sure he went to school every single day soaking in all the teacher offered. When he decided he was ready, although only thirteen, he got a job with the local paper. He believed starting at the bottom was the best way to learn the business, even if it meant working in the evenings after school.

             After about six months, Gilbert started hinting to his boss that he should let him report on what was happening in the town around them.

          "Mr. Harper, I'm out and about a great deal and you would be surprised at how people talk when they think it's only a youngster standing nearby."

            Mr. Harper would stand there, hand smoothing his beard as if he were contemplating letting Gilbert try his hand at reporting. In the end, however, he would shake his head in the negative saying, "You may have a point, but I don't think you're ready."

           These setbacks only incited Gilbert to try again and again and again until finally, one evening when the two of them were closing up, Mr. Harper gave his assent.

         Gilbert smiled at himself in the mirror remembering that first story. It was about how the local mill owner was shortchanging his customers by a few ounces each. Gilbert cringed at the memory of Mr. Harper's response to his story.

Amazon

Doris Gardner-McCraw -

Author, Speaker, Historian-specializing in
Colorado and Women's History

Angela Raines - author: Telling Stories Where Love & History Meet

Books: Angela Raines Books

Website: Angela Raines - author

Angela Raines FaceBook: Click Here

Victorian Mourning Etiquette

 

by Kristin Holt

 

Everyone was born. Everyone eventually dies. Every culture has its methods of celebrating, acknowledging, and properly managing both. In the Victorian-era United States, many of the traditions surrounding the mourning period came directly from mother England. After all, emigrants brought their attitudes, practices, and ideas of propriety with them.

STAY HOME!

The Ladies' and Gentlemens' Etiquette: A Complete Manual of the Manners and Dress of American Society by Mrs. E. B. (Eliza Bisbee) Duffey, published in 1877 in Philadelphia by Porter and Coates.

 

NO VISITING

The Ladies' and Gentlemens' Etiquette: A Complete Manual of the Manners and Dress of American Society by Mrs. E. B. (Eliza Bisbee) Duffey, published in 1877 in Philadelphia by Porter and Coates.

WHICH HOUSES ARE IN MORNING?

The Ladies' and Gentlemens' Etiquette: A Complete Manual of the Manners and Dress of American Society by Mrs. E. B. (Eliza Bisbee) Duffey, published in 1877 in Philadelphia by Porter and Coates.

 

NOTICES

The Ladies' and Gentlemen's Etiquette: A Complete Manual of the Manners and Dress of American Society by Mrs. E. B. (Eliza Bisbee) Duffey, published in 1877 in Philadelphia by Porter and Coates, excerpts from page 216 - 217.

Then as now, newspaper announcements mark the passing of young and old. As do notification of next-of-kin, whether done via mail or telegraph by family members or those in charge (such as the attorney who contacted Felicity Percival before Courting Miss Cartwright begins. Little did she know, her father had lived a few hundred miles from her, but she'd never known so much as his name. Interested to see how she takes it? Read the first two scenes, in their entirety, with the "Look Inside" feature on Amazon.com or the opening scene within a blog article (that introduced this novella when it debuted within the 90-day long 1st page bestselling western historical romance anthology, Cowboys and Calico).

Stationery marketed specifically for mourning, announcements or condolences. Montgomery Ward and Co Catalog, 1895, p 112.

The Ladies' and Gentlemen's Etiquette: A Complete Manual of the Manners and Dress of American Society by Mrs. E. B. (Eliza Bisbee) Duffey, published in 1877 in Philadelphia by Porter and Coates.

LIVE (and die) WITHIN YOUR MEANS

PERIOD OF MOURNING

The Ladies' and Gentlemen's Etiquette: A Complete Manual of the Manners and Dress of American Society by Mrs. E. B. (Eliza Bisbee) Duffey, published in 1877 in Philadelphia by Porter and Coates.

 

BLACK CLOTHING

Though Queen Victoria was not monarch to United States citizens, most idealized her fashion statements, her expectations and behavior (etiquette). If Queen Victoria wore black to mourn lost loved ones, so did Americans with the means to do so. [Mrs. Duffey's etiquette book explains in detail how we cannot separate ourselves from our English roots and English etiquette.]

This photograph shows "Queen Victoria with the five surviving children of her daughter, Princess Alice, dressed in mourning clothing for their mother and their sister Princess Marie in early 1879." Image: Public Domain. Source: Wikipedia, which further explains, "Princess Irene, kneeling on the left, with her grandmother Queen Victoria and, from left to right, her sister Elizabeth, brother Ernst-Ludwig, sister Victoria and, seated on the floor, her sister Alix in February 1879, two months after the death of her mother."

This second photograph of the royal princesses (1862) shows "Victoria's five daughters (Alice, Helena, Beatrice, Victoria and Louise), photographed wearing mourning black beneath a bust of their late father, Prince Albert (1862)." Image: Public Domain. Source: Wikipedia.

"In Britain, black is the colour traditionally associated with mourning for the dead. The customs and etiquette expected of men, and especially women, were rigid during much of the Victorian era. The expectations depended on a complex hierarchy of close or distant relationship with the deceased. The closer the relationship, the longer the mourning period and the wearing of black." [Source]

MOURNING ATTIRE

These two 1898 artist's rendition of Mourning is from Harper's Bazaar (originally had one a: Bazar)(1867-1898), page 291.  

The image that follows further explains from Harper's Bazaar the fashion of mourning attire, including fabric selections, accoutrements such as veils, jackets, ribbons, collars, and cuffs.

Note the alternate historic spelling of today's "crêpe" as "crape". Wikipedia shows an image of an historic "mourning bonnet in hard crape". (This image verifies the historic spelling as well as provides an excellent image of this fabric for recognition purposes.)

Mourning Attire 1898. Snapshot of text on p 291 of Harper's Bazaar 1867-1898

Note: Gray is was not appropriate for initial mourning. Mrs. E.B. Duffey made that quite clear:

The Ladies' and Gentlemens' Etiquette: A Complete Manual of the Manners and Dress of American Society by Mrs. E. B. (Eliza Bisbee) Duffey, published in 1877 in Philadelphia by Porter and Coates.

 

BLACK ARM BANDS

"In some cultures, a black armband signifies that the wearer is in mourning or wishes to identify with the commemoration of a family friend, comrade or team member who has died. This use is particularly common in the first meeting following the loss of a member." [Source]

Note the black armband worn over Rocky Gideon's sleeve on the cover of Courting Miss Cartwright. (I didn't intentionally choose this...but my cover designer (and author) Charlene Raddon of Silver Sage Book Covers had read the story and knew exactly the circumstances my characters found themselves in. Two points for Charlene!)

MOURNING JEWELRY

Mourning Jewelry made of jet, for sale in the Sears, Roebuck & Co. Catalogue No. 104 of 1897, pp 436.

Did you note the jet ear drops worn by Queen Victoria's daughters and granddaughters in the mourning family photographs shown earlier?

MOURNING BUTTONS

Mourning Buttons for sale in the Sears, Roebuck & Co. Catalogue No 104 of  1897.Also made of jet, these black buttons with lever backs were added to shirts made (intentionally) without buttons (much like the use of cuff links to 'button' a double button-hole in French-cuff men's dress shirts of today).

CEMETERY FENCING

In an article I posted about the Victorian-era historic pioneer cemetery in Silver City, Idaho, I shared photographs I took of headstones surrounded by cemetery fencing. Pay attention next time you're in a 19th century cemetery--I imagine you'll see similar fencing setting off family plots.

Cemetery fencing for sale in the 1895 Montgomery, Ward, & Co Spring and Summer Catalogue.

BUT IN THE OLD WEST?

Most of the customs surrounding mourning and loss of loved ones, in the Old West, was dictated by availability, the demands of scraping an existence out of mines, farms, ranches, or the great Trail west. Women didn't always wear mourning fashions--because one of their two dresses likely wasn't mourning crêpe. Those on a homestead might keep weeds pulled and flowers watered--if circumstances allowed, but weren't likely to plant a purchased fence (but might scrape together enough time to build a picket fence to keep the stock from trampling the burial plots). Once the train brought "civilization", many if not all of these niceties were practiced as much as possible. Women brought a settling refinement to the Wild West, and once towns had a church, a school, and enough women, such niceties were expected.

THEN CONTRASTED TO NOW

Things have definitely changed. I attend a funeral in a black suit or simply my Sunday dress. Even when losing my beloved father-in-law, my culture doesn't dictate I wear mourning black, refrain from social events, or otherwise ensure all who see me know I'm grieving his loss. 

Pioneer and frontier women were tough. They had to be. Life went on, work waited for no man (or woman), and myriad duties awaited.

In the case of Felicity Percival (Courting Miss Cartwright), she's an outsider in a town that loved the minister who'd been a fixture in their lives for many years. To lose him to a lingering illness was a blow to the whole community. But what about the daughter who'd never met him, hadn't any idea what he looked like, or why he'd summoned her home? I couldn't imagine how this young woman would feel or the weight of unanswered questions she carried. That was one of the sparks of "What If" that set off the course of discovery in developing Felicity Percival Cartwright (and eventually, Gideon)'s story. Have you read it yet? If not, now's a great time to pick up the kindle edition. The low introductory price of $0.99 won't last long! It's been on preorder for $0.99 since October 1, 2016 and will increase to the regular price of $2.99 on Monday, November 7th. 

 

   

Used paperbacks (Harper's Bazaar) from $1.26 (+ $3.99 shipping)

Used paperbacks (Ladies' and Gentlemen's Etiquette) 

Mrs. Duffey explains ever so much more about properly conducting oneself at this difficult time of life. She covers "Exhibition of the Corpse", "After the Funeral", "At the Funeral" and so much more.

Find Mrs. E.B. Duffey's The Ladies' and Gentlemen's Etiquette: A Complete Manual of the Manners and Dress of American Society (1877):

1.  Archive.org  (free)
2.  Google.com  (free)
3.  Hathi Trust.org  (free)
4.  Forgotten Books.org  (subscription site)
5.  Amazon.com (purchase)

Did you find any of this American history surrounding the customs (and etiquette) of mourning to be surprising? Please scroll down and reply. We'd love to carry on the conversation.

Hi! I'm Kristin Holt, USA Today Bestselling Author.

I write frequent articles (or view recent posts easily on my Home Page, scroll down) about the nineteenth century American west–every subject of possible interest to readers, amateur historians, authors…as all of these tidbits surfaced while researching for my books. I also blog monthly at Sweet Americana Sweethearts (first Friday of each month) and Romancing the Genres (third Tuesday of each Month).

I love to hear from readers! Please drop me a note. Or find me on Facebook.

Sweet Romance Appropriate for All Audiences

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